MLK Day Excuses

So, it's a federal holiday. At least that's what the calendar tells me. But, almost everybody I know has to work anyway. Must be the crowd I run with. No government workers around here!

Anyway, something told me that there would be some "I'm too sick to come in" phone calls at the office this morning. And, I wasn't disappointed. Unfortunately, the excuses weren't as colorful as these "20 best excuses" that appeared online today:

1. I was sprayed by a skunk.
2. I tripped over my dog and was knocked unconscious.
3. My bus broke down and was held up by robbers.
4. I was arrested as a result of mistaken identity.
5. I forgot to come back to work after lunch.
6. I couldn't find my shoes.
7. I hurt myself bowling.
8. I was spit on by a venomous snake.
9. I totaled my wife's jeep in a collision with a cow.
10. A hitman was looking for me.
11. My curlers burned my hair and I had to go to the hairdresser.
12. I eloped.
13. My brain went to sleep and I couldn't wake it up.
14. My cat unplugged my alarm clock.
15. I had to be there for my husband's grand jury trial.
16. I had to ship my grandmother's bones to India.
17. I forgot what day of the week it was.
18. Someone slipped drugs in my drink last night.
19. A tree fell on my car.
20. My monkey died.

Well, at least #14 is believable . . .