Cat scratch fever

I thought I should warn any of you who might be seeing me outside of cyberspace in the next few days: I got in the middle of a cat fight at 5 am today.

Big mistake.

That's the short story. Here's the longer, gory version:

So, the cats were acting funny in the wee morning hours, kept jumping up in the bed and waking me up WAY before the alarm clock was due to go off. I tried ignoring them as long as I could. But, by 5 o'clock, I figured they must be out of food downstairs, so I trudged down to the kitchen to fill up their bowl.

Well, when I flipped on the kitchen light, I immediately noticed something was awry: I had a flock of geese on my back porch!

I stand corrected. They weren't geese, but Muscovy ducks. You know those really big, ugly ones with all the red bumps all over their faces. Although, in my present condition, I shouldn't be making fun of anyone's appearance.

Anyway, the cats went absolutely nuts, and commenced to body-slamming my sliding glass door. It was all I could do to grab them both by the nape of their necks and toss them into the downstairs bathroom.

The geese/ducks were tame by comparison. They skedaddled off the porch and out of my back yard as soon as I walked out the battered sliding glass door.

Well, I figured, "I'm up, now. Might as well go ahead and get ready for work." So, I went back upstairs, and flipped on the bathroom light to start the bath water.

Then, and only then, did I realize that I had blood streaming down my face!

In the adrenaline of the moment, I never felt the wound. But, one of those cas got me GOOD!

So, if you see me out on the streets, I will not be offended if you cast your eyes in the opposite direction to save your lunch!

Just give me a few days, and I'm sure I'll be back to looking like an Adonis!