I prefer caffeine

I mean, if I'm going to have to pay a lot of money for some stimulus, I'll trot down to the Starbuck's on the corner.

Because, trust me, the stimulus checks the federal government is being so kind to mail all of we taxpaying socks does not come without strings attached.

I got mine, and I'm really conflicted about it.

Most of my consternation stems from the fact that I know where it came from. Our esteemed representatives up in Washington went out and borrowed $168 Billion, and are now "loaning" it back to us. In the mean time, debt is accruing that we, our kids, and probably our grandkids are going to be paying back for years to come.

Worse than that, the injection of all those extra dollars is going to make all the dollars we already had in our pockets worth LESS (worth less = worthless?!). Think about simple supply and demand, folks. The more you have of any thing, the less demand there is for that thing. So, it's relative value to other things DECLINES.

If that's too much talking over your head, let me be a little more plain. This is going to cause inflation.

That's already a large part of the pain we're all feeling at the gas station and grocery store. Our dollars have no buying power any more, so it takes more of them to get what we want.

Now, we have billions and billions of more dollars floating around out there. So, hold on to your socks! Gas prices are going to continue to climb, and milk and rice are going to become even more precious commodities.

If we really wanted to do this economy a favor, we would all refuse to cash these "stimulus checks." They may be worth more than their face value if we just wait a couple of years. We should then be able to sell them on eBay or craigslist as souvenirs of a failed economic policy.

But, I talk a big talk. I'm still going to deposit this sucker in my account today . . .